Positive parenting is the continual relationship of a parent(s) and a child or children that includes caring, teaching, leading, communicating, and providing for the needs of a child consistently and unconditionally.
There are many ways to parent children; if your child is misbehaving, take the time to see what he or she may need. It is your attention, a listening ear, empathy and your understanding they need in these times. They have big emotions; they don’t know how to express it making them feel tied and unwell.
When your child is acting out, usually they are trying to communicate a need. There is so much more to behaviour than most people think. Children don’t try to upset us, there is usually something behind it. They are communicating their need through behaviour and as parents, we have to find a way to understand and connect with them so we can maintain a positive relationship.
Here are some parenting tips
Make a point to smile at your children whenever you make eye contact. Let your smile greet them at the start of the day and meet them with it all throughout.
2. Solicit Help
Ask for help when needed. Don’t play the martyr. Get your kids involved, be specific with the type of help you need. Finally, number your requests to make it easier for kids to follow.
3. Speak Softly
Whenever the volume in your house rises, lower yours. Also, ask requests in a soft and low voice.
4. Say Exactly What You Mean
Say exactly what you mean when speaking to your children or giving a request. Don’t beat around the bush, not tease, provoke or have double standards. Be as specific as possible.
Sit down and write out each of your children's strengths and weaknesses. Then write down what you can do to help your child develop their strengths and combat their weaknesses. If your child is old enough, discuss these things with them. Choose one area to work on a week and give praise when there is change!
Sometimes behind a child’s emotions when they are mad might mean they are disappointed that things didn’t work out as planned.
Sometimes behind a child’s emotions when they are sad imply that they feel a loss of some kind.
Sometimes behind a child’s emotions when they are angry signal that they want to control something they can’t.
Sometimes behind a child’s emotions when they are scared suggest that there might be something about “feeling scared” that they don’t understand.
Sometimes behind a child’s emotions when they are embarrassed, they might feel or see that they didn’t meet the expectation
11. Check Gottman Tips
Repair Attempts after a disagreement or tension can sound like this:
• Can I take that back?
• I need your support.
• Can we take a break?
• Let me try again.
• I’m sorry.
• I really messed up; I can see my part in this.
• I want to say this more gently, but I don’t know how to…
• Thank you for sharing this with me.
• Let’s talk about something else for a while and we will come back to this.
• I had no idea.
• I see your point.
• I understand.
• I love you.
Simplify family rule and be firm; really communicate with your child, be a role a model of calm behaviour, focus on routines, and keep it fun! Parents are the ultimate role models for children. Every word, movement and action has an effect. No other person or outside force has a greater influence on a child than a parent.